On Grief Spectatoring

O, here they come. Hamlet, Act 4, scene 2 Described on a spoken word CD read by its author in the book Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture (Roxane Gay, ed.), Brandon Taylor's 'friends' on Facebook sent him wishes of "love and light" on the death of his abusive mother; then they follow all … Continue reading On Grief Spectatoring →

Necessity

As testy sick men, when their deaths be near,No news but health from their physicians know; Shakespeare, Sonnet 140 lines 7-8 Will I encounter a 'testy sick' man on this first visit to Mr. Whojathinkski? He's not long retired and a hospice-grade disability forbids his working on the wood framed bungalow storm windows. They're missing … Continue reading Necessity →

Fear Of Falling

At every nurse visit I consider my hospice patients' risk for falling. We ask ten questions on our Fall Risk Assessment: Are you aged sixty-five or older? Then you get a prize: One Point. Hang onto your points, we'll add them up later. Have you fallen during last 3 months? No, don't demonstrate how you … Continue reading Fear Of Falling →

Ghee and The Guy: Another Look At Big Fat

I'm cooking tonight's meal using the ghee found to the right of my stove, typically stored by itself back and against the wall, tucked into the shadow of an angled countertop microwave. Sometimes I don't see the ghee, then reach for avocado oil instead. Olive oil shouldn't be heated. A good single-sourced, cold-pressed, organic extra … Continue reading Ghee and The Guy: Another Look At Big Fat →

It’s Going to Get Worse: Why We Avoid Disease Education

And global warming, while we're in the mood to be not in the mood to hear about it. Because things always get worse, always. Or seldom if we're not in the mood for certain truths of life. Or never, because living in the Land of the Free means having some choices left, for certain people, … Continue reading It’s Going to Get Worse: Why We Avoid Disease Education →

Let’s double the Ambien

Small eyes heavy with eyelash mascara, dark pencil lines under, opening over-tired/not sleeping/how can I sleep when he's calling my name every hour, he forgets so easily. Tonight, before turning off the room's common light and going to bed she will try reading in the other room after giving him the hypnotic rather than reading … Continue reading Let’s double the Ambien →

Depression: Grief’s Forgotten Middle Child

I texted advice to a patient's wife (typically to patient partners who must, perforce, be patient) after she thanked me for talking to him about how realistic he is in perceiving his situation, and how giving my considered opinion that he was right on time to be feeling shity and depressed. After our talk, he … Continue reading Depression: Grief’s Forgotten Middle Child →

Vaguely, About Hospice Sex

Happy Nurses Week, or Day. This year RNs renew their licenses. During the renewal year I'm mailed course catalogues to help me gather the necessary and approved (in Illinois) 20 CEUs. Nothing this year about opioid addiction; the court settlement about Oxycontin/oxycodone is forgotten news. Today I find CEUs in my workday. We've covered Sex … Continue reading Vaguely, About Hospice Sex →

Blankets: Our Need For Comfort

One of my guys in hospice seems to have retreated further within himself. Today he barely acknowledged me in this noisiest of urban nursing facilities specializing in mental health. He seems to be busy or preoccupied now, trying to concentrate. Perhaps he's let go of all volition and has something to teach me. I sit. … Continue reading Blankets: Our Need For Comfort →

Coffee and Other Breaks

My wife and I had breakfast over the weekend with my former hospice colleague who told us she was "done with doing home health" nursing, simply because, since the pandemic has closed public business toilets, she could not make herself sit on just anyone's home toilet when she happened to need one. And being a … Continue reading Coffee and Other Breaks →